Saturday, June 4, 2011

I’m Back (I'm not dead yet)

Holy crap, its June already and I haven’t done anything for two months! Well since an excuse is not enough forgive the readers and myself (that sounded smug) here are multiple excuses:
  • After watching a marathon of ‘Neon Genesis Evangelion’, I had to check myself into an asylum.
  • Aliens kidnapped me; they were nice guys (I guess, they look like roaches), except they dropped me of in Johannesburg.
  • Rebbeca Black gave me MRSA.
  • When I found out that the world was going end on May 21st, I had to build a bomb shelter.  Then I had to demolish the whole damn thing on the 22nd.
  • Cthulhu got out of his cage again.
  • I was locked up in a Libyan POW camp after trying to steal Muammar Gaddafi's sunglasses.
  • I was exiled by the "The Monsters" after I discovered Lady Gaga’s true identity: Madonna.
  • My birthday bash got so out of hand, I woke up in a coffin near Vienna.
  • My plan to destroy 'Two and a Half Men' was taking over my life.
  • The President of the United State of America, Barrack Obama, gave me the most important task of my generation’s history; find Osama Bin Laden’s porn stash.
  • My television and laptop became self-aware and would only let me watch shows on TLC.
  • The finals for my classes were coming up and I needed to do a marathon cram session.
  • All of the above.
At least two of these excuses are true.  Anyway I'm just here to say that I'm not dead and sorry for the hiatus.  To make up for it, here is a hint for my next post: It is a list of films made by a man who believes that actors should be treated like cattle.


  1. I always swore I would never get involved in political wars but this is just too important to sit idly by. I am prepared to give my life in the search for Bin Laden's porn stash.